• Villa Vie CEO Kathy Villalba apologized to residents in an emotional internal message on Friday.
• "The ship was my baby, but it was your home," Villalba wrote.
• Soon afterward, the message was deleted, Villa Vie residents told Business Insider.

On Friday, the CEO of the company behind the doomed Odyssey cruise ship apologized to residents, many of whom are now stranded in Cambodia. Hours later, that apology was gone.

Villa Vie Residences CEO and founding partner Kathy Villalba sent Odyssey residents a message on Circle, the ship’s internal messaging platform, saying she was sorry for the "pain, the loss, and the uncertainty" they face after the voyage came to an abrupt halt this week.

Villa Vie had promised residents of its 509-cabin ship a chance to live permanently at sea and circumnavigate the world every three-and-a-half years. On Tuesday morning, residents were given only a few hours' notice to disembark.

Business Insider reviewed screenshots of the memo, which was deleted hours after it was posted. Three Villa Vie residents with access to Circle confirmed the memo's contents and that it was no longer visible.

In it, Villalba said the media attention had become "overwhelming" and that she had been advised to refrain from making further public comments.

Villalba and Villa Vie did not respond to requests for comment on the memo or why it was deleted.

In the apology note, Villalba said the company was still in talks with potential investors and expressed hope that a resident-led initiative to buy the ship would succeed.

You can read the full text here:

Dear Residents,

I owe all of you a message, and I am sorry if it has taken me this long to find the words.

I think part of me has been in denial that this could really be happening. Even now, we continue to speak with potential investors, holding on to whatever hope remains because I simply cannot imagine letting this dream go.

The media attention has become overwhelming, to the point that reporters are now contacting our families, including people who have nothing to do with the company.

On the advice of counsel, I have been asked to refrain from making further public comments, particularly as even conversations within Circle are no longer private.

But I couldn't remain silent without telling you how deeply sorry I am for the pain, the loss, and the uncertainty so many of you are facing.

I know so many of you are hurting, scared, and angry, and I wish more than anything that I could take that pain away.

For nearly two years, this wasn't just a business to me. It was my entire life. I poured my heart, my soul, and everything I had into it The ship was my baby, but it was your home, and in so many ways, all of you became my family. I care for this community as though it were my own children, through the good days and the difficult ones.

My team used to call me the "Resident Wikipedia," because I knew all of you by name and by story. That meant so much to me, because getting to know each of you individually was the best part of all of this.

The thought of losing it leaves a hole in my heart that I cannot begin to describe.

Thank you for believing in two ordinary people with an extraordinary dream. Together, we created something truly special. We traveled the world, built friendships, shared laughter and tears, and experienced a way of life that so few people ever get to know.

I still don't want this to be the end.

I sincerely hope the resident initiative succeeds, and we stand ready to assist wherever we reasonably can to help preserve the lifestyle you have all grown to love.

Please know that we love and care about each and every one of you. Through the good and the bad, even through the disagreements and disappointments, that has never changed.

Above all, I hope everyone is safe, supported, and looking after one another during this incredibly difficult time.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you for being part of this dream.

With love,

Kathy <3

• Joel Greiff planned to live on Villa Vie's Odyssey for decades, but was aboard for less than a month.
• He packed his Florida life into six bags and boarded the Odyssey earlier this month.
• On Tuesday, however, residents were ordered off in Cambodia as Villa Vie suspended operations.

This as-told-to essay is based on several conversations with Joel Greiff, 57, a Villa Vie Odyssey passenger from Florida. It has been edited for length and clarity. Villa Vie Residences and its founders, Mikael Petterson and Kathy Villalba, did not immediately respond to a request from Business Insider.

I planned to live on the Odyssey for 10, 20, or even more years. I don't think that will be happening now.

Still, unlike others, I am celebrating the time I was able to enjoy on the Odyssey, which was 26 days before Villa Vie suspended operations on Tuesday and we had to disembark in Cambodia.

I thought I had found my new home

In April 2024, I read an article about the Odyssey. I called a sales agent at the company and asked a bunch of questions.

The following May, I stayed on the Odyssey for four days. Within five minutes of boarding, I concluded that this was my new home, these were my new neighbors, and this would be my future.

What drew me in was that it would be a place where I could come, live, and be part of a community. I was following residents on Facebook and reached out to a couple of them individually. I asked whether they were happy with their decisions, and they said yes.

In August this year, I left my home in Florida. I spent a couple of months driving around the US, visiting friends and family, and saying my goodbyes. Then, in September, I flew to Bangkok and moved onto the ship on October 1.

I introduced 'Fantastic Joel' — that's what I go by — to many people on a ship. Most enjoyed meeting me. I'm sure a few didn't. There was always something going on, and people were really nice to each other. There were arts-and-crafts, plays, karaoke, and Seder dinners for Jewish residents.

I tried to put myself out there, meet a lot of different people, and say hi. There was always a good community having a good time. I absolutely fell in love with the crew. They deserve all the accolades and respect.

It was clear that things had changed

Compared with my visit in May 2025, it was clear to me that services and amenities had deteriorated by the time I moved aboard in October. Laundry was being done less frequently. Before going to Angkor Wat, I had to do my own laundry. The itinerary kept changing, and we sometimes sat at sea for days. Personally, I was fine with it.

Circle, Villa Vie's communication platform, was how the CEO and residents communicated. It's also how we got internal notices about the itinerary changes, visa applications, and other ship business.

On Sunday, we were told on Circle that if the company didn't receive money by Tuesday, the ship would not continue sailing. On Monday, we were told again that without money, the voyage would stop.

On Tuesday morning, I was at the bus station, coming back from a trip to Angkor Wat, charging my phone and waiting to get the shuttle back to the ship. The message came through on Circle telling us to disembark. It was about 7 a.m., and we had to be out by 2 p.m.

Before I arrived in Asia, I had fit everything I owned into four checked suitcases and two carry-on bags. I was able to repack within an hour. For people who had lived on the Odyssey for two years and had a home's worth of belongings, it was much harder.

I went somewhere quiet, then returned to help

After we disembarked, I went to Kampot, a small town in Cambodia, because I wanted to be somewhere peaceful. People had said it was relaxing.

Sihanoukville, where the ship was, felt like the opposite: a big, noisy place full of casinos and high-rises. I saw staff still working and residents who were discombobulated. I thought, 'I've got to get out of this craziness.'

For now, I've rented an affordable two-bedroom apartment for a month, about three hours away from Sihanoukville, where the ship is. I've been going back to the ship to help my fellow residents with their luggage, finding places to stay, and getting their belongings off the ship.

The residents are all coming together and helping each other out. Somebody says, "Do you have a suitcase?" and somebody says, "Yes, I have one spare."

I may never get my money back

I paid a lot for a 26-day stay on the Odyssey. Most likely I will never see it again. To me, if I lose the money, I don't need it. I don't care.

After all, the most important things in life are great friends and family, traveling the world, creating adventures, learning new things and, most importantly, helping others.

If the ship somehow finds a way to become a viable business, I would get back on it. If not, I'll explore living in Chiang Mai, Thailand. That was already my Plan B when I left Florida.

Amanda Goh and Alexandra Karplus contributed reporting.

Have you spent any time on the Villa Vie Odyssey as a cabin owner, renter, or staff member? If you have a story to share, get in touch with this reporter: jzitser@businessinsider.com.

Joel Greiff, 57, was new to the Villa Vie Odyssey. He had boarded the residential cruise ship on October 1 and kept his belongings to a minimum.

Traveling light came in handy when all passengers were abruptly told to leave the ship on Tuesday in Sihanoukville, Cambodia, amid what management has described as an oil-price crisis.

"I unpacked in an hour and I packed back up in an hour," Greiff told Business Insider.

Villa Vie Residences, which operates the cruise, said it had to shut the ship down because of the spiking price of fuel amid the Iran War. On Wednesday, founder Mikael Petterson told Business Insider the prices were part of a "cascading effect" that brought the ship to a standstill.

"I'm the villain in the story, but I'm doing everything I can to support the residents on a solution," he said.

Greiff is among the many Odyssey passengers who have to figure out what to do next, now that their floating mobile home is suddenly no longer so mobile. In interviews with Business Insider in the days since residents were told to disembark, they shared reactions that range from heartbreak and despondence to gratitude for the good times on board — and a buoyant hopefulness that the ship will sail again.

Villa Vie Residences marketed the Odyssey as a "home at sea." It offered five-year residency packages starting at $59,999, permanent residency packages starting at $119,999, and a multi-cabin "Home Suite Home" option starting at $229,999.

Passengers were promised a lifestyle of continuous travel around the world, stopping at more than 400 ports in over 140 countries.

Jim and Chris Guld are no strangers to a life in motion. They spent 14 years living in an RV and traveling around the US before settling in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. They run Geeks on Tour, a small company that offers tech training for travelers.

When they sold their townhouse to move aboard the Odyssey in April 2025, they kept a small camper van with a friend near Gainesville.

"It was going to be our lifeboat in case, early on, the Odyssey didn't pan out," Jim Guld, 72, told Business Insider.

That "lifeboat" is still waiting in Florida. The couple is in Cambodia.

In a notice on its website, Villa Vie Residences said it was helping coordinate residents' disembarkation and temporary accommodation. But the Gulds said that was not how their departure unfolded.

"We found our own hotel," Guld said. The company provided a shuttle, but he said it dropped them at "a park in the middle of town."

At least the couple had a long-planned trip to Chiang Mai, Thailand, to look forward to. They expect to continue traveling afterward, visiting places that should have been next on the Odyssey's itinerary, such as South Asia and Africa.

"We don't plan on going back to the States anytime soon," he said.

Claude Sadovsky paid about $100,000 in December 2023 for his cabin on the Odyssey. He told Business Insider he had left the ship about three weeks before the shutdown.

The retired doctor, 69, said he had started to feel the cruise was no longer delivering the round-the-world experience he had signed up for.

"It started out great," Sadovsky said. "Early on, I remember eating dinner with a group, and I looked at them and said, 'I really think this is worth twice what I'm paying.' As time went on, that feeling kind of dissipated," he said.

As more ports were dropped and the ship revisited places he had already seen, Sadovsky left in early October and returned to his apartment in Maui, Hawaii.

"I was amazed we made it as far as we did. And I was always prepared for it to end," he said. "I'm kind of surprised we made it two years, to be honest."

For now, he's happy to spend some time back home, though he said he'll consider returning if the cruise operators find a way forward, "especially if they could get it back anywhere close to when it first started."

"I really enjoyed that portion of it," he said.

The news has left others trying to stitch their dream life back together.

That includes a group of residents trying to raise enough money to buy the ship, said a 68-year-old resident named Paul Montoya: "If there is any option for us to move ahead, we kind of think that would be the only way."

"It's a Hail Mary," he added. For now, he and his wife plan to head to Malaysia for some medical check-ups, and then to Singapore. After that, their plans are vague, but he said they'll stay in the region "with the hope that things could change with the ship."

"It breaks my heart to think that this may be over," said Angela Nuran Gokturk.

She said she, her husband, and other passengers "are willing to do whatever we can that makes financial sense, of course, because we want to make this continue."

"This was our retirement," she said. "This is what we wanted to do for the rest of our lives, and it really was a dream lifestyle."

'I would do it again'

Dwight and Sheila Greene of Fort Worth, Texas, weren't on the ship when it halted operations. They spent the past month traveling around Cambodia and Thailand on their own schedule.

The Greenes, who run a Facebook page called "All Over the World with Dwight and Sheila," said they had made a habit of hopping on and off the ship to spend more time in places they wanted to explore.

"We use it like an aircraft carrier," said Dwight, 64.

On Wednesday, the couple flew to Singapore, where they'll be boarding a different, preplanned, 11-day cruise on Friday.

Dwight said their Royal Princess cruise was due to end in Singapore on November 10, around the time when the Villa Vie Odyssey's original itinerary was expected to return to Singapore.

"I thought, 'Oh, this is perfect. They'll arrive, we'll arrive, and we'll just change ships,'" Greene said.

That still is the plan, he added. Most of their belongings are still in their cabin. The Odyssey's recent travails have left them undaunted.

"If you told me this was going to happen, I would do it again," Greene said. "I would spend the same money. I would do it again in a heartbeat, because that's how rewarding it has been for Sheila and myself."

As for Greiff, the Odyssey newcomer, he's staying in a hotel near the ship while helping other residents collect their belongings. His next step will be to take a train to Kampot, Cambodia. He's already found a place to rent there and expects to spend a few weeks settling in, checking on the status of his Cambodian visa and getting a local SIM card. Longer term, he's considering Chiang Mai, Thailand, as a potential base.

One thing is clear: He doesn't plan to return to Florida. He used to own a condo and a car there, but he's sold both.

"I can live in Asia for $2,000 a month and live very well," he said. "It would be very hard in the United States."

• The boss of Villa Vie Residences sent passengers an "urgent" appeal for financial help in August.
• Three months before the cruise halted in Cambodia, CEO Kathy Villalba warned of soaring fuel costs.
• "We have now reached a critical point," she wrote. Read the full message to residents below.

Almost three months before Villa Vie Residences suspended operations on Tuesday, leaving residents of the "never-ending" cruise stranded in Cambodia, the company had already warned the Odyssey's residents that it was running out of money for fuel.

In an August 1 memo to residents labeled "urgent," Villa Vie CEO and founding partner Kathy Villalba asked residents for financial contributions to buy fuel.

The memo, which Business Insider reviewed, said the company needed to make "immediate and creative operational decisions to preserve the voyage."

The company behind the 509-cabin ship had promised a permanent life at sea and a voyage around the world every three-and-a-half years for its residents. That came to an abrupt halt on Tuesday, when residents were told to disembark with only a few hours' notice.

In a Tuesday statement announcing it had halted operations, Villa Vie said it had taken "significant steps to reduce fuel consumption" after prices rocketed following the onset of the US-Israel war with Iran in February, but that these steps had not been enough.

Villa Vie founder Mikael Petterson told Business Insider in a phone call on Wednesday that the fuel price surge triggered a "cascading effect" that culminated in the suspension of operations.

Financial pressures became clear to residents in April, two months after the war in Iran began, when Villa Vie asked residents to loan the company money, offering interest rates of 12% to 24%, according to a separate letter viewed by Business Insider.

And by August, Villa Vie had reached a "critical point," according to Villalba's message, which you can read in full below.

Villalba, Petterson, and Villa Vie did not respond to multiple requests for comment from Business Insider.

URGENT OPERATIONAL UPDATE

Confidentiality Reminder: This communication contains confidential and proprietary information intended solely for current Residents and authorized participants of the Villa Vie community. It is being shared through Circle as part of our commitment to transparency and open communication. We respectfully ask that you do not repost, forward, or otherwise distribute this information outside of Circle without the prior written consent of Villa Vie Residences.

Dear Residents,

We want to provide you with a direct, straightforward update regarding Odyssey's current operational realities.

When the fuel contribution was requested several months ago, participation was not universal. The contributions received helped some, but they covered only part of the extraordinary increase in fuel costs. Since then, the company has exhausted its available reserves covering the remaining shortfall and keeping Odyssey moving.

We had hoped that improving conditions in the region would begin to stabilize fuel prices. Unfortunately, the continued conflict and renewed market disruption have caused prices to rise sharply again. This is not simply an itinerary issue. It is an immediate cash-flow challenge that directly affects our ability to purchase the fuel required to continue the voyage.

Odyssey currently needs approximately 650 metric tons of fuel. Under normal market conditions, that fuel would cost approximately $450,000. At today's prices, the cost is nearly double ($800,000).

We have now reached a critical point. The lack of full participation, combined with the unprecedented increase in fuel costs, means we must make immediate and creative operational decisions to preserve the voyage.

We are working toward receiving a partial fuel delivery as early as Monday. Our berth is available until Friday, August 7 at 4:00 p.m., subject to final confirmation from the port agent and Singapore Port Authority. The current recommendation is to remain alongside until August 7 and then sail at a slower, more economical speed to Nha Trang for our scheduled arrival on August 12.

We are asking every Resident who did not previously contribute to please do so now. We are also asking those who are able to provide additional support to consider helping with this immediate fuel requirement.

While every Resident has a contract with Villa Vie, this international crisis has created costs far beyond the circumstances contemplated when those agreements were made. The financial need is real, immediate, and necessary to keep Odyssey moving. This is a moment when preserving our home and continuing the voyage requires support beyond contractual minimums from those who are able to provide it.

To conserve fuel and reduce operating costs, we will cancel Brunei and proceed directly from Singapore to Nha Trang. This will help reduce the expense, but it does not eliminate the need to fund the required bunkering.

We will provide another update as soon as the fuel, berth, and departure arrangements are confirmed.

Thank you for your understanding and support.

— VVR Management."

• Passengers on an abruptly halted round-the-world cruise say they were given just hours to disembark.
• "We are heartbroken," said one couple who lived aboard the Villa Vie Odyssey for two years.
• A fresh cash infusion fell apart last week, the company's executive chairman said. "I feel awful."

Passengers on a live-aboard round-the-world cruise say they were abruptly asked to leave the ship and given only hours to disembark.

Villa Vie Residences, which operates the residential cruise ship Villa Vie Odyssey, said on Tuesday it had halted operations due to surging fuel costs.

The ship was docked at the port of Sihanoukville in Cambodia when the announcement was made, with passengers saying they were given only eight hours to disembark.

"On October 27, 2026, we received notice from the CEO at around 6 a.m. that all residents had to disembark by 2 p.m. that day," passengers Lanette Canen and Johan Bodin told Business Insider by email.

Canen and Bodin have been on the Odyssey since it first set sail in September 2024 and run a YouTube channel called Living Life on a Cruise about their experiences on board.

"We knew leaving was a possibility, but the eight-hour notice still surprised us," they said.

The couple shared a video on their YouTube channel that appears to show the moment a staff member announced that passengers must leave the ship.

"Unfortunately, they were unable to secure the fuel necessary to continue operations," a male voice says in the video.

A notice on the Villa Vie Residences website says the company is working with residents to arrange temporary living arrangements and that it is evaluating restructuring options over the next 60 days.

Mikael Petterson, executive chairman of Villa Vie Residences, told Business Insider he understood residents' feelings of shock and sadness.

"I get it. I get it. I feel awful," he said in a phone interview. "They're counting on me to make the decisions here and there's nothing else I'm focused on. I'm the villain in the story, but I'm doing everything I can to support the residents on a solution forward."

Petterson said that until last week, he was in talks with a potential investor and was expecting a new infusion of cash. When the deal fell apart, he said, the company was out of options.

Villa Vie Residences Chief Executive Kathy Villalba didn't immediately respond to requests for comment.

Soaring fuel costs

Villa Vie Residences said in a statement Tuesday that the surging cost of fuel since the beginning of the Iran war had made operating the cruise liner increasingly difficult.

The company said its monthly fuel expenses per cabin, which had previously averaged about $1,800, had risen as much as 344% in parts of Asia, to an estimated $6,000 to $8,000.

"Since the conflict began in late February, we have taken significant steps to reduce fuel consumption, including slowing the itinerary and spending more time in port," Villa Vie Residences said.

"Those measures have not been enough to offset the extraordinary increase in fuel costs, and we have been unable to continue carrying the resulting operating losses."

On August 1, Villalba, the CEO, sent residents a message titled "Urgent operational update" on an internal messaging platform. In the message, she referenced a "fuel contribution" that had been previously requested of residents. Business Insider has viewed a screenshot of the message.

"When the fuel contribution was requested several months ago, participation was not universal," she wrote in the message. "The contributions received helped some, but they covered only part of the extraordinary increase in fuel costs."

Villalba wrote that the "cash-flow" challenge had continued, and the Odyssey needed 650 metric tons of fuel, adding that fuel prices had almost doubled.

"We have now reached a critical point. The lack of full participation, combined with the unprecedented increase in fuel costs, means we must make immediate and creative operational decisions to preserve the voyage," her message said.

It continued, "We are asking every Resident who did not previously contribute to please do so now. We are also asking those who are able to provide additional support to consider helping with this immediate fuel requirement."

Villalba described the financial need as "real, immediate, and necessary to keep Odyssey moving." It went on, "This is a moment when preserving our home and continuing the voyage requires support beyond contractual minimums from those who are able to provide it."

Residents scrambled to leave their cabins

Among the passengers asked to disembark on Tuesday with only a few hours' notice was Barbara Fiegel, 62, who has lived with her partner aboard the ship since December 2024.

"Everybody's just shocked, everybody's just saddened by this whole issue," she said. "We're still processing, trying to debate what we're going to do."

Fiegel said she and her partner booked a hotel room in Cambodia, then returned to the ship Tuesday evening and Wednesday afternoon to empty their safe and pack their belongings. "Today, as we approached, as we went back on the shuttle back to the ship, I couldn't stop crying," she said.

They plan to return on Thursday to collect their remaining items. Fiegel described the atmosphere on the Odyssey as a “ghost town.”

Joel Greiff, 57, moved aboard the ship at the start of the month and planned to live on the ship for 10 or 20 years or more. “I don’t think that will be happening,” he said.

When residents were told to disembark, Greiff emptied his cabin. “I personally grabbed everything,” he said.

He said he would like to return if Villa Vie Residences resumes operations. If not, he is planning to move to Thailand. In the meantime, he has rented an apartment in Cambodia for a month.

Greiff said he plans to return to the Odyssey on Thursday to assist other residents and “help with their luggage, help them find a place, and just start getting them and all their stuff off the ship.”

Jacob Shamsian contributed to this story.

Have you spent any time on the Villa Vie Odyssey as a cabin owner, renter, or staff member? If you have a story to share, get in touch with this reporter: jzitser@businessinsider.com.

Correction: October 28, 2026 — An earlier version of this story misspelled Johan Bodin's name.

• It was meant to be a never-ending residential cruise. Now, operations have halted.
• Villa Vie Residences said it can no longer operate due to fuel expenses surging more than 300%.
• The cruise line set sail in 2024 with the promise of a live-in, continuous voyage around the world.

A cruise ship selling the promise of a permanent life at sea has come to an abrupt stop.

Villa Vie Residences, which operates the residential cruise ship Villa Vie Odyssey, announced on Tuesday that it had suspended operations in Cambodia amid steep increases in fuel costs.

The company said its monthly fuel expenses per cabin, which had previously averaged about $1,800, had risen as much as 344% in parts of Asia, to an estimated $6,000 to $8,000.

The US-Israeli war with Iran began in February, and Iran's subsequent closure of the Strait of Hormuz — a vital chokepoint for global oil shipments — sent energy prices soaring around the world.

"Since the conflict began in late February, we have taken significant steps to reduce fuel consumption, including slowing the itinerary and spending more time in port," Villa Vie Residences said.

"Those measures have not been enough to offset the extraordinary increase in fuel costs, and we have been unable to continue carrying the resulting operating losses."

Villa Vie Residences sold permanent cabins on its 509-cabin ship, the Odyssey, ranging from $119,999 to $439,999. Its pitch to residents was a never-ending cruise around the world with stops at more than 400 ports of call and a global circumnavigation every three-and-a-half years.

The ship, which has a pool deck, spa, and a pickleball court, also offered five-year residencies, starting at $59,999.

The rising fuel costs put the company's operating model under unsustainable financial pressure, Villa Vie Residences said. The company added that it was evaluating options, but that no financing or transaction had been finalized.

"Passing the full increase on to residents is not a realistic solution," the company said. "Our focus now is on supporting residents, crew, and employees while we work toward restructuring and recapitalization over the next 60 days. That work is ongoing, and no outcome is assured."

The press release said the company was working with residents to coordinate disembarkation in Cambodia and to identify temporary living arrangements for them.

The Odyssey first set sail from Belfast in September 2024 after four months of delays.

Villa Vie Residences did not say how many residents were affected and did not immediately respond to a request for comment from Business Insider.

Have you spent time on the Villa Vie Odyssey? If you have a story to share, get in touch with this reporter: jzitser@businessinsider.com.

• Brian Rooney, 60, filed for Chapter 7 bankruptcy in 2024.
• During his late wife's illness, he built up medical and credit-card debt.
• After she died, the grief made it difficult for him to sustain his business.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Brian Rooney, the 60-year-old founder of Chapter7Reset.com, who lives in Conroe, Texas. He lost his wife in 2013. The essay has been edited for length and clarity, and the details verified.

When you're grieving, you're not thinking about how to move a business forward, capture new market share, or adapt to new technologies. You're not thinking straight because you're overwhelmed by a cloud of loss, pain, and sorrow. Some days, you're just trying to get through morning to night.

In 2013, I lost my wife, my partner, and my life. I still had to deal with the financial reality. I had underestimated what grief would do to my ability to run a business.

Tina was the yin to my yang

My wife, Tina, and I had 24 great years together. She was the yin to my yang. We met through a mutual friend, got to know each other, and fell in love. She was a strong, independent thinker. She was loving, kept me in check, and was an outstanding mother.

Our five kids were all born close together, and I was very involved in their lives. One of the reasons I started a business was because I wanted to be the dad who could be at home, coach my sons in basketball, and play in recitals with my daughter.

We'd tried both working early on, but Tina stopped early on in our relationship. I was the breadwinner, and she managed the kids.

I launched my email-marketing business in 2000. For a time, it did very, very well.

My wife was diagnosed with cancer

In 2011, things felt almost too good to be true. Then Tina noticed a little bump in the roof of her mouth. She went to the dentist; they did a biopsy, and we didn't think too much about it. Weeks later, I was sitting in my home office when she came over with the phone. With a very disturbed look, she said, "I have cancer."

Our lives turned upside down.

At first, because the cancer wasn't very aggressive, we tried homeopathic remedies. Then came chemotherapy, radiation, and major surgeries. The treatments were costly, and while the Affordable Care Act covered quite a bit, we still had high deductibles. Some hospitals wouldn't admit her until the deductible had been paid.

I would sit at the table with spreadsheets, trying to work out the finances. I was trying to be strong for my wife, but sometimes I'd go to the corner of the room and cry. The unspeakable thing to consider was that I might lose my wife because I couldn't afford to pay for it all.

A lot of the medical bills were paid with credit cards, and we ran up a lot of credit-card debt. I had six mouths to feed, for which I relied mostly on credit cards. I sold my music gear, like my guitars and amps. We moved from a beautiful rental house in a nice area of Texas to a much less expensive apartment. We weren't going to shows, basketball games, or on trips. None of that bothered me. The focus was on getting Mama healthy.

Friends and family stepped in here and there to help out. My kids were approaching adulthood, so they didn't need much looking after, but working from home let me adjust my schedule as needed.

I couldn't keep the business moving forward

There were days when I couldn't touch the business. It was mostly automated, but there were things I needed to step in and manage. If a server went down, I'd need to stay up all night to fix it while checking on my wife in the other room.

I wasn't resting or sleeping. I wasn't able to drive the business forward.

During that time, the industry was changing. New technology became available, and we weren't able to keep up. I was so focused on Tina's care that we missed opportunities. We had contractors and a business partner, and I wish I'd outsourced a lot faster. I didn't realize how fast I was losing.

I became a widower at 47

Tina died in November 2013. She was 49, and I was a 47-year-old widower.

Those first few weeks, I'd wake up, roll over, realize she wasn't there, and know that she never would be again. I would talk myself out of bed, one body part at a time.

The business was still there. My business partner was focused on the technical side, but I had the marketing and entrepreneurial mindset. A lot of things that needed to get done didn't get done. Honestly, at that point, I didn't care. It was a dark time for me

I wanted a clean slate

The business was declining, and meanwhile, I'd built up hundreds of thousands of dollars in credit-card and medical debt. I thought I could put everything on my credit cards, turn things around, and pay it down. Things never turned around, and as the business continued to decline, there was less money to draw from it.

I spoke with bankruptcy attorneys, but I was convinced I could fix the problem.

In 2021, I got remarried. My second wife knew about the financial mess I was in. The interest and penalties were compounding so quickly. There was constant pressure from phone calls, letters, and demands for payment. I wanted relief and a clean slate.

In early 2024, after speaking with my business partner, we decided to dissolve the business. Later that year, I filed for Chapter 7 bankruptcy.

I felt both relief and shame after filing for bankruptcy

When I filed for bankruptcy, I had no assets because I'd sold them all to pay my bills. When the debt was wiped out, I felt relief and shame, but the relief took over once I stopped getting phone calls and letters.

It was time to rebuild. I got a sales job, which I hadn't had in decades. I did AI certification training and started rebuilding my credit with credit-rebuilding cards. I launched ChapterSevenReset.com, a free guide to help people in a similar position.

One of the hardest lessons was that we didn't have a life-insurance policy on Tina. It never dawned on me because she wasn't contributing financially. I never considered how caring for her and my grief would take away from my generating income. My second wife and I both have life insurance policies for each other.

Nowadays, my friends say the "old Brian" is back. I've made peace, as best you can, with the fact that Tina is gone. I'm like an amputee. There's a part of me that's missing, and that part will always be missing. It itches. It's always there.