• To become homeowners sooner, my wife and I bought a house with her parents.
• At first, navigating the space wasn't easy, but we're still able to have ample privacy.
• Living with my in-laws has its challenges, but I can't imagine living anywhere else.

I've known my wife's parents for nearly a decade, and we've always gotten along, but I never imagined sharing a roof with them. That all changed last year, when my wife suddenly popped the question: "How would you feel about buying a house with my mom and dad?"

We knew it would be years before we could afford the down payment on a house, particularly anywhere near Frederick, Maryland, where we wanted to live.

Even though we were both lawyers in our late 30s, we didn't have as much saved as we should have. We had each chosen lower-paying work over big-firm jobs and lost financial ground during our divorces in the late 2010s.

Without the help of my in-laws, my wife and I would've had to wait another decade or so to buy a house. But if we purchased a place together, her parents would provide the down payment, and we would cover more than half of the mortgage.

So, just like that, I agreed to become roommates with my in-laws.

The house gave all of us the space we needed, but we still had to learn how to share it

When we began our search, we envisioned a duplex — two separate living spaces joined together — but we had a hard time finding one.

We struggled even more to find a house with bedrooms on both the first and second floors, something crucial for my in-laws, since they're in their late 60s, and we didn't want them worrying about climbing stairs now or as they get older.

After several months of looking, we finally found a place that checked all the boxes: a 1950s one-story house that the previous owner had renovated to add a second floor and a finished basement.

The upstairs, where my wife and I would live, had three bedrooms, two bathrooms, and a laundry space. Downstairs, where my in-laws would live, was the main kitchen and living room, a small den, a bedroom, a bathroom, and a small back kitchen.

There was enough space for all four of us — along with our two cats, our dog, and their dog — so we put in an offer.

For the first couple of months after moving in, the house was a sea of boxes, and it seemed almost impossible that we could cram all four lives into one place.

My wife and mother-in-law argued about the furniture we needed to get for the shared spaces, and we debated back and forth about what to do with the back kitchen, which we ultimately decided to convert into a laundry/mud room.

As time went on, we also had to get used to the quirks of living together. My wife works from home, which means she has to go downstairs to the main kitchen and interact with her parents before she can fully wake up. Luckily, we've just converted the upstairs laundry space into a little kitchenette, so now she can make her morning smoothie in peace.

Additionally, I learned to put on my dress shoes only when I'm on my way out of the house in the morning, as I had previously been startling my in-laws awake by clomping around in the closet just above their bedroom.

But even though we're all in the same house, my wife and I still feel like we have ample privacy. Our bedroom is large, and my in-laws don't really spend much time in the basement, so sometimes, we like to hang out there as well.

Thankfully, expenses haven't been an issue, since we split most day-to-day purchases right down the middle by contributing to a joint bank account.

Living together has made everyday life easier in ways I didn't expect

Despite the challenges, sharing a home with my in-laws for the past eight months has been great.

My mother-in-law graciously offered to make dinner most nights, so we can all sit down and have a home-cooked meal as a family. When we go out of town, my in-laws watch our dog and our cats.

Once we have children, grandma and grandpa will be right there to help, and as my in-laws get older, we'll be right there to assist them.

Obviously, there are times when we annoy each other, but I've gotten to know my in-laws much better since we became roommates. The arrangement has turned us into a family and given us more financial security, and the plan is never to move again.

• Recently, I traveled with my husband, our two young children, my in-laws, and other family members.
• Our international trip to Mexico felt more manageable and fun because we had so many people.
• For now, I wouldn't travel internationally with my kids without my in-laws or extended family.

Some people don't get along with their in-laws, but I'm not one of them.

I lived with my in-laws for years from my mid-20s to early 30s. My husband and I still go to their house every week or two, and after we had kids, my mother-in-law has always stepped in, whether coming over to assist with bath time or to drop off food.

So, it's no surprise that traveling with them (and other members of our extended family) to Mexico was a no-brainer.

We've actually done it multiple times, but this latest trip was the first with both my two small children, who are 3 years old and almost 8 months old.

Looking back, this whole Mexico trip wouldn't have been feasible without my in-laws and extended family.

It was nice having a big group as we headed to Mexico for a few days

We traveled from San Diego to Querétaro, Mexico, with a whole crew in tow: me, my husband, our kids, my mother-in-law, father-in-law, sister-in-law, niece, nephew, and one of my husband's cousins.

Our big family trip was a four-day adventure, and the main purpose was to attend my husband's cousin's wedding. (It later turned into a five-day event thanks to a flight delay, but more on that later.)

We've done large family trips like this since 2019, so we have an intuitive groove, where everyone contributes in some way — looking up where to eat, figuring out what to see, or even getting coffee delivered to the hotel.

This time, we split up into three separate rooms at a hotel where most of the wedding guests were staying, but were located right across the hall from each other.

This arrangement made it easy for the kids to head to their grandparents' room for bath time or to hang out with the cousins while my husband and I got ready.

Having more people came in handy throughout the trip — and made it more fun

Not only was it extremely helpful to have more hands on deck, but it was genuinely fun traveling with a group spanning such a wide range of ages, from 8 months old to age 59.

There were various interests and dynamics at play, which also meant more excitement and more brainpower.

Cousins were funny and entertaining, which helped break the tension in stressful moments or squash the occasional toddler tantrum. I also appreciated that abuelita helped with diaper changes and baths, while abuelito helped carry or hold the kids whenever we were out and about.

Although our large crew mostly stayed together throughout the trip, we were also able to split up and do different things.

For instance, sometimes part of the family went out to the nearby market to explore, while others stayed in their room to nap or hang out.

At one point, most of our group went into the Centro Histórico in Santiago de Querétaro for churros while my husband and I put the kids to bed.

Our big group's ability to divide and conquer especially came in handy when our travel plans were thrown off.

When our flight was delayed until the next day, we all went into action: My in-laws arranged a new hotel for us, my husband and sister-in-law booked transportation for a large group, and I called the travel-insurance agency to see what our options were. We all kept an eye on the kids.

It was nice to have multiple adults working to solve a problem, rather than the pressure falling solely on my husband and me.

The journey back home was much longer and more complex thanks to layovers, but again, being around family made it easier.

I could have my sister-in-law, who was in the aisle behind me, watch my toddler while I went to the airplane restroom and my husband helped the baby nap.

We couldn't have done this trip without our support system

I've done shorter, more local overnight expeditions with my children — I've even taken them on a work trip — but this was our first international journey with them.

My children are very young, with a close enough age gap that makes travel particularly difficult right now. However, going on this trip with in-laws and family made everything feel so much more manageable.

Any time I felt a bit tired or overwhelmed, there was someone there to make it easier. It was especially fantastic, considering how poorly the baby slept during the trip, which left my husband and me even more fatigued.

I'm so grateful my kids got to see a bit of their heritage in Mexico and have some new experiences. I can't wait to show the world to my children, especially since I couldn't travel outside of the country until I was 17.

However, I'd prefer to hold off on these international travel dreams for a couple of years when my kids are slightly older and don't require quite as many naps or diaper changes.

For now, multigenerational trips make the most sense for us — and my wonderful in-laws have changed the travel game.

• My husband and I live in a separate house on the same property as my parents and siblings.
• Our unique living arrangement has come with lots of surprises along the way.
• Even though we live so close to each other, we have boundaries and our own separate lives.

In 2024, my husband and I began building our own house on the same property as my parents, siblings, and sister-in-law, creating a "family compound." In total, there are two separate houses, nine family members, and three adorable golden retrievers on the property.

Our family has always spent a lot of time together, but before moving into our new home in April, I don't think I truly understood what day-to-day life would be like.

Here are the biggest surprises I've encountered so far.

My family and I still have our own separate lives.

Although my husband, daughter, and I live next door to the rest of my family, we still have our own houses, routines, and lives. Some days, when we all happen to be on different pages, we don't see each other at all.

I think this balance is a huge part of what makes our setup successful. No one feels as though they are on top of each other, and my husband and I can simply take our daughter to our house, close the door, and be our own little family.

Privacy and boundaries are still possible, even when living so close together.

For us, one of the keys to making our living arrangement successful is respect for personal space and boundaries.

For example, my younger siblings don't come over to my house after about 8:00 p.m. because they know my daughter is asleep and my husband and I are likely settling in for the night. This isn't something we ever had to ask them to do, they just respect our privacy and nightly routine.

The same goes for my parents. They text my husband and me before popping over to visit and always avoid walking into our house unannounced.

A lot of people don't seem to understand multigenerational living.

Since sharing our family compound on social media, I was taken aback by how many people assumed that our family was part of a religious group or separate "community," rather than our setup being an example of multigenerational living.

I knew that "family compounds" aren't incredibly common nowadays, at least in the United States, but I definitely didn't think they were so widely misunderstood.

People appear to confuse our setup with communal living, rather than our family simply living as neighbors next to each other.

Casual get-togethers and dinners happen spontaneously.

I've been pleasantly surprised by how much easier casual get-togethers, dinners, and hangouts are.

I can just pop over to my parents' house and then "head home" whenever I want to. I don't need a reason to leave or an excuse to use if I'm just not feeling social.

We also don't typically find ourselves planning get-togethers; they just kind of happen. I can wake up on a Saturday morning with no plans, and within an hour, everyone is hanging out by the pool, playing yard games, and cooking food together.

Having my family around has really improved my mental health.

As a stay-at-home mom, having my siblings and parents around throughout the week makes day-to-day life with a toddler so much more enjoyable.

Our setup gives me other adults to interact with, another set of hands when I need them, and simply remedies any of the aspects of motherhood that can otherwise feel lonely.

It's also a game changer for me to have my own mom as a resource. Rather than turning to Google, I can walk across the driveway and pick my mom's brain for parenting advice as a first-time mom.

My marriage has actually gotten even stronger since living here.

One of the many perks that I did not anticipate was how much the support of a village would benefit my relationship with my husband.

With other people around to lend a hand with our daughter, direct access to girl time with my mom and sister, and my husband having the ability to go watch a football game with my dad or play basketball with my brothers, we have easier access to hobbies and self-care outlets as parents. This leaves more quality time for us as a couple.

Our setup felt 'normal' pretty quickly.

It's taken me by surprise how after only living in our home for six months, this setup already feels so natural and "normal." I can't imagine going back to living even 15 minutes down the road from our family.

Sometimes it takes people asking questions or sharing their opinion on our living arrangements to remind me that our setup is a whole lot less common than I think.

When I think back to my expectations surrounding a 'family compound' prior to moving into our home, I had only really envisioned the more overarching concepts such as family dinners, lots of quality time and no longer having to drive to visit each other.

However, I didn't realize how many of the small details would make such a positive impact on our day-to-day lives.

• I followed Ina Garten's recipes for pumpkin, apple, and pecan pie to see which I liked best. 
• The pecan pie tasted like a cocktail, and the apple pie was shockingly simple to throw together.
• I ended up with extra pumpkin-pie filling, but Garten's buttery crust was the real winner. 

I cook and bake a lot, but I'm not a huge fan of making pies. I sometimes struggle to create a buttery, flaky crust, and my fillings don't always have the right texture.

So, I decided to sharpen my skills using three approachable and delicious-sounding recipes from Ina Garten.

Here's how my day of baking went as I attempted to make Garten's pecan, pumpkin, and apple pies.

Before I could make each pie, I had to prep the crust.

I've followed a few Garten pie recipes before, and I remember liking her easy-to-make crust. That memory held true.

I needed to make four crusts: a bottom and top for the apple pie, and one crust each for the pumpkin and pecan pies. It only took me between 10 and 15 minutes.

Garten uses a food processor for her "perfect pie crust," which makes prep easy. I divided the dough into two batches, and I could already tell from the look and feel that the crusts would be buttery and delicious.

With all of the dough resting in the fridge, I was ready to start tackling the individual pies.

I started with the easiest recipe: the maple-pecan pie.

Garten's maple-pecan pie has just 10 ingredients, excluding the crust.

I was excited to taste the combination of maple syrup and bourbon with the pecans. And I liked that she included some fresh orange zest to cut through the richer ingredients, like corn syrup and honey.

The filling smelled incredible while it was baking.

To make the pie, all I had to do was whisk the filling ingredients — minus the pecans — together.

Then I simply added the nuts and gave it a final stir before pouring the filling into the prepared pie crust.

I put the pie in the oven for just under an hour.

To ensure I got an evenly cooked crust, I turned the pie halfway through the bake.

The process was easy, and I loved the enticing smells coming from the oven as it baked.

I was pretty impressed with my first pie.

The flavors of the pecan pie reminded me of an old-fashioned cocktail, thanks to the bourbon and orange.

But the pecans ended up a little chewier than I would've liked. If I make this pie again, I'd probably toast the nuts first for a better texture.

It tasted good, but I should’ve let it firm up in the fridge before serving.

Despite letting the pecan pie fully cool before slicing into it, the pieces fell apart on me.

Next time, I think I'd let it chill in the fridge before serving so the filling can firm up more.

Garten’s pumpkin-pie recipe included a homemade rum whipped cream.

I moved on to making Garten's pumpkin pie.

I was intrigued by some of the ingredients in the filling, like orange zest and rum, but most were pretty standard, including pumpkin purée, brown sugar, cinnamon, ginger, and nutmeg.

I was most excited to make the accompanying rum whipped cream.

It sounded like a delicious, indulgent addition to the homemade pie, with ingredients such as crème fraîche or mascarpone and a dark rum.

For this pie, I needed to bake my crust twice.

First, I rolled out one of my crusts and placed it in a pie tin.

Unlike the other two recipes, this one required me to blind-bake the crust before adding the filling. I found some dried lentils and rice to use as pie weights to keep it from puffing up too much.

This first bake helped prep the crust for the liquid-y filling, but it also meant the edges got a little darker by the end than I'd hoped.

I ended up with way more filling than I needed.

The pumpkin filling was easy to make as I just had to whisk all the ingredients together in a large bowl.

I made way more filling than I needed for the pie crust, so I set it aside in hopes I could find a way to use it later. (My partner had a fun idea to use the filling to make pumpkin-pie custards in ramekins.)

The crust may have been darker than I wanted, but the pie was still delicious.

Despite the slightly overdone crust, Garten's pumpkin pie turned out great in terms of both taste and texture.

The filling was sweet but not too sweet, and the subtle hint of orange helped balance the custard's richness. The texture of it was smooth and creamy.

The pie had a perfect custardy texture and a sturdy, buttery crust

The crust was flaky and buttery, yet sturdy enough to hold the weight of the pumpkin filling. Each slice came out of the tin without crumbling.

The rum whipped cream was a unique companion to the pumpkin pie. I liked it much better than regular whipped cream.

Finally, I started on Garten's apple pie.

I saved the most intimidating pie for last.

I've made apple pies many times before, but I was still worried about whether the top crust would turn out right and if the filling would soften enough by the time the crust was done baking.

Garten's recipe for deep-dish apple pie calls for Granny Smith apples, which tend to be more sour and tart than sweet. The filling also called for both lemon and orange juices and zest, plus plenty of spices.

With all of those ingredients and only a ½ cup of sugar in the filling, I was worried the pie might not be sweet enough.

All my worries went away pretty quickly.

The filling was easy to make after I finished peeling, coring, and chopping what felt like 100 apples. The recipe called for 4 pounds!

The dough for my crust was very easy to roll out and transfer to the tin, thanks to the butter and vegetable shortening. It made easy work of assembling the pie.

I couldn’t believe how beautiful it looked, both before and after baking.

After adding my top crust, I cut slits for ventilation, brushed it with an egg wash, and sprinkled it with sugar, per Garten's instructions.

I let the pie bake for about an hour. Afterward, the top crust was golden and looked and smelled incredible.

The crust was definitely the tastiest part of this apple pie.

Garten's apple pie was pretty tasty, but the crust was by far the best part.

The extra sugar sprinkling on top gave it a sweet flavor and crunchy texture. It was so delicious I could eat it on its own.

However, I wasn't the biggest fan of the filling's flavor.

The filling was decent, but it had a little bit too much citrus for me.

I was glad the apples softened well without becoming mushy, but I think I'd precook them a little bit more next time. That would hopefully help concentrate the apple flavor and keep the filling from shrinking so far away from the top crust.

I also might sub some of the tart apples for a sweeter variety, as the combination of the Granny Smiths and citrus made for a pretty tart pie.

All of the pies were good, but I was actually most impressed by Garten's crust.

In the end, all of the pies I made using Garten's recipes turned out pretty good, and they were easy enough to make in one day without breaking a sweat.

I like that she adds citrus zest to each of these pies to really boost their flavors and give them a freshness. The rum whipped cream that went with the pumpkin pie was also delicious, and I think it would pair really well with the pecan pie, too.

However, my favorite part of all three recipes was the pie crust.

It was quick and easy to make, and it worked well with all the different fillings. I'll be using this crust for all my pies moving forward.

This story was originally published on November 19, 2023, and most recently updated on October 29, 2026.