• A new AARP report showed that caregivers are spending much more out of pocket than in 2021.
• Household and housing expenses account for 42% of average out-of-pocket caregiving costs.
• Adults may take on another job or work more hours to help cover caregiving costs.

Millions of families are dishing out five figures this year to care for their loved ones.

AARP found that caregivers spent $11,508 out of pocket this year on average, up nearly 60% from $7,242 five years ago. The new results were based on a study conducted in June and July featuring over 2,500 adults who provide care to an adult relative or friend.

"The increase in costs may indicate that caregivers are purchasing more or different types of support, covering a greater share or broader range of care-related expenses, or managing more intensive or complex care needs," the report said. "The difference may also partly reflect the resumption of services following the pandemic, enhancement to the 2026 questionnaire and differences in the caregiver population between the two different studies."

Household expenses like food and housing accounted for 42% of caregiving expenses, followed by 29% for medical expenses. AARP said 37% of medical expenses are from "copays, coinsurance, insurance premiums and direct payments to providers," followed by 19% for nursing homes.

Tamara Johnson, who is in her 50s, had worked a well-paying corporate leadership job but quit to care for her husband after a major stroke. He went from earning almost $200,000 a year to bringing in $50,000 in medical disability retirement. His care costs quickly became a massive share of their combined income.

"It's been taking two steps forward and three steps back," Johnson said. "We're still on that healing journey."

AARP asked working caregivers what work-related actions they've had to take: work more hours, work an additional job, take unpaid time off, take paid time off, work fewer hours, and work different hours. Thirty-four percent of workers experienced three to six of those impacts, and another 31% experienced one or two. AARP data suggests that people who got second jobs or increased hours at their current jobs had the highest out-of-pocket costs and needed to find a solution.

Caring for someone with dementia can be even more costly. Caregivers providing assistance to a relative or friend living with dementia spend $5,600 more out of pocket, on average, than caregivers for loved ones without dementia. Additionally, caregivers with a relative or friend in a nursing home spent, on average, half of their annual household income on caregiving expenses.

Wendy Rowland, who is in her 50s, relocated from Tennessee to Mississippi after selling her and her husband's home to help pay for his long-term care. Her husband was diagnosed with early-onset Lewy body dementia, and his facility costs $6,750 a month. Because he hasn't reached the age when he could claim Social Security, he receives $2,700 a month in disability insurance, which falls way short of his monthly care costs.

"I've navigated this mostly on my own. It's more than a lot of people can take, and it was almost more than I could take," Rowland said. "It was a really dark time when everything first started, but I knew I had to keep it together at least a little to take care of everything."

• Viaano Spruyt first became a caregiver as a teenager when his father fell ill.
• After his father died, he moved to Australia to study and build a life there.
• Three years later, he returned home to be closer to family after his mother's health scare.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Viaano Spruyt, 29, founder of Huddle, an AI-powered social network for fandoms. He is based in Singapore. It has been edited for length and clarity.

I first became a caregiver when I was a teenager.

My dad had an incurable respiratory disease, and he was on an oxygen tank every day. He would get breathless after walking for just a few minutes and needed help with day-to-day living.

Back then, my mom was the sole breadwinner for the family, and my sister was too young to grasp what was going on.

As the oldest child and only son, I took responsibility for his daily care. I fed him his meals and brought him to appointments at hospitals around Singapore.

He passed away when I was 19. Several years later, when I was 22, I moved to the Gold Coast in Australia on a scholarship. I earned my bachelor's in psychology, the first step toward my ambition to become a clinical psychologist.

Over the next three years, I built a real life in Australia.

I had assimilated into the culture, was in a serious relationship, and was set to pursue a master's degree. I was also in the process of applying for permanent residency.

My family was always in the back of my mind. Still, I wanted to experience life outside Singapore, and I was in the midst of building the future I thought I would have.

The call that changed everything

Then one day, I was reminded what it meant to be so far from home.

My mom was walking to catch a bus to work when her knees suddenly gave way. She kept calling me for help, but I'd missed her calls.

Unable to walk, she ended up sitting alone, crying for hours. A kind stranger eventually called for help, and she was taken to a local hospital. She was wheelchair-bound for the next few weeks. Later, she told me she wished I'd been there.

My mom is now 61 and has advanced osteoarthritis in both knees, with severe cartilage loss, meniscus damage, and joint degeneration.

When I asked why she had called me rather than my younger sister, my mom said she didn't want to distract my sister from her final exams and internship. Still, I was the first person she thought to call for help, even from thousands of miles away.

That was the exact moment I knew I had to come home.

Seeing what happened to my mom brought me back to when my dad was ill. I didn't want to be on the other side of the world when my mom was dealing with a health issue.

It wasn't just my mom. My grandparents, now in their 80s, were also getting older, and I realized my family needed me.

I came home and started over

After my mom's incident, I gave up the plans I'd made in Australia and moved back to Singapore in 2022. That was probably the hardest decision I have ever made in my life.

My Australian girlfriend moved to Singapore for a few months to see if we could build a life here instead. But things didn't work out, and we eventually ended the relationship.

Since coming back, I haven't had much of a social life.

I ended up starting Huddle, an AI-powered social network for fandoms, with my cofounder, Fabian. Starting a company was not the path I had spent my life working toward, but it became another passion.

At this stage, my life is very much centered on work and my family, with whom I live. I choose to have no other commitments outside those two things, which gives me some room to respond when my family needs support.

I make sure my mom gets the care she needs. I take her to the hospital and arrange her treatments. I do the same for my grandparents.

When I returned, my younger sister had just started university. I wanted her to focus on her studies, so I took on more of the day-to-day care for our family.

Once my mom is doing better, I hope to move to the US to grow my company with my cofounder, while my sister and I share responsibility for supporting her.

Coming back meant starting over in a lot of ways. However, I would make that decision again and again for my mom. Always.